The Feelings Wheel

A few days ago, I was walking around in worksplace, I had my coffee in my hand and I actually was thinking a lot in my mind, then I ran into a friend I usually talk with. He asked me on. But the truth was, I wasn’t really good. We had a short conversation and I walked toward a desk to start work.

I sat at a desk and opened my laptop to start working, but before that I asked myself a simple question. If I wanted to answer honestly, what would I have said? Then I remembered the Feelings Wheel. I opened it quickly and started spinning the wheel while tilting my head.

I wasn’t good, so my feeling was “Bad.” On the wheel, “Bad” (in violet color) is one of the first-layer emotions. A little deeper than that, we have feelings like Tired, Stressed, Busy, or Bored. I tried to figure out which one fit, and it was clear I was feeling Tired and Stressed. Going one layer deeper: under Tired, there are words like Unfocused and Sleepy and “Unfocused” felt very real to me right then. Under Stressed, there are Out of Control and Overwhelmed and both of those hit me strongly.

The whole thing took maybe 30 seconds. From opening the site, playing with the wheel, and thinking about my feelings. But the result of that curiosity was helpful. Realizing I felt “Out of Control” made it clear that the situation wasn’t something I could immediately fix. I just had to accept these feelings and sit with them. In other words, I was stressed, and that was okay.

We have the “How are you?” conversation every day. Most of the time, we answer automatically. Good. Not bad. Busy. But how often do we actually know what we’re feeling? Playing with this Feeling Wheel can help us to understand feelings more clearly so we can live the life more consciously and fully.